Forever Home

The animal hospital called this afternoon to tell us we could pick-up Beanie ashes. His box is so beautiful, it has his name engraved on the front just as we asked for. We didn't know what to expect with his box we didn't get to pick it out or anything. So I was teary when I noticed that on the top there are carved Daisies. My absolute favorite flower.

We picked out a really nice spot in our living room for him. We haven't nor are we going to tell the girls about it until they are much older. They won't understand so why confuse them.

As far as where everyone here is with it. I still have a hard time believing he is gone. Chris has his moments as well. He said that he had to do a password verification and his question was what is the name of your favorite pet. He said it made his eyes tear to read that. Lily is doing better with understanding that Beanie isn't coming home. We have been firm with that every time she tries to challenge it. She has been saying more and more that Beanie is in her heart. As for Guss is ok at best. He is still looking for Bean in the yard. Each time he goes out he has this happy anticipation that Bean will be there waiting for him. Then he goes out wags his tail and sniffs, you can see the happiness fall away. He just does his business and comes back in. We took the girls out this week to get him some toys. Lily picked him out tennis balls to run for. He likes that. We have even gotten him to oink a few times- that is his happy sound. Guss has always been closer to Chris, but this past week he has done things that only Beanie ever did. He will come up and out his head in my lap, he is now yet another guest in the bathroom with me, came to my side of the bed the other night as if to say good-night- he had never done that before, ever and he follows me from room to room. I told Chris the other day that Gus and I are going to get each other through this. He needs us as much as we need him.