Friday, October 31, 2008

Happy Halloween!!

We had such a good day! This was a work Friday for Chris, so the girls and I made Halloween cookies, and paper pumpkins for our door. Lily is really starting to get into drawling. She used to just draw lines and such, but now we go one adventures in her drawings. It has been really neat to watch!

Once Chris got home we had dinner, and then we got everybody dressed. Lily was Super Girl, and Rdette was an Angel. Super Girl was born from a potty song we made up for Lily. Sing along now...

She pee pees in the potty, like a big girl
She pee pee in the potty, she's Super Girl!

High Fives all around!

So when we saw the super girl outfit we thought how perfect! Even better she loved it! She was running all over the living room yelling Up Up Away!!

Rdette's was a second choice. We had picked her out a Bumble bee out fit. We bought it was back in late August. When we got it home she was over the moon cute in it, but I was afraid the she would out grow it before Halloween. When we took it back to exchange it for the next size they didn't have it. I stalked Babies R Us for weeks until I gave up and started looking for something else. When we found the Angel it was just as sweet and had elastic- perfect! :-)

Once we got them all dressed and ready to go we realized that it was still pretty light outside. We took them out front and let them play and of course took tons of pictures! Chris took them across the street to one of our neighbors houses and Rdette let it known quite loudly that she wasn't happy. After that house, she stayed with me on the front porch handing out candy. Chris took Lil to about 4 houses and headed home. In that time we had 0 trick 0r treaters!

Bored with the prospect of no trick or treaters, we loaded the girls and went to see Aunt Lizzie and Uncle Jeff. We hung out there for a while. When we got home it was just past their bedtime, so we let them stay up for a while longer and then it was time for bed.

I think by the end of the night we had a total of three knocks at our door, one while we were putting the girls to bed. Chris will have a ton of candy to take to work on Monday!

Zoo Boo

Ok this post is a little late, but, better late then never!! I like so many other Mommy's use this as my baby book, so as long as it makes it out of my brain I am happy!

Anywho...We had planned not to go to Zoo Boo because we found out that even though we were National Zoo Members there was still going to be a significant cost. So we just quietly let that go. However on Sunday morning everyone was up bright and early, we were watching "Mommy's cartoons" (- anything that isn't a real cartoon in Lilyese)and we saw that the Baltimore Zoo was offering the same event. We sat and watched the segment and at the end they said that it was FREE with admission on Zoo Membership. Well our ears perked right up because our National Zoo membership gets us unto the Baltimore Zoo as well!

We then decided that we should go and that it would be a ton of fun. So we got the girls dressed in their costumes and off we went. We did ask Lily if she wanted to go to the Zoo after we decided that we were going to go, she let out a huge wahoo, and then in her most excited voice said "let's go guys, come on!"

When we got there it was already packed! We made it through with our pass and we went to find the Zoo Boo area. It was all in the woods, so we parked the stroller and let Rdette walk too! They had it set up so that the kids could trick or treat at the different vendors. So we walked from booth to booth. Lily still is getting the hang of the trick or treat thing so kept wanting to give the people her candy! Once we had our fill of trick or treating we headed over to the main zoo!

Lily insisted that we see the Elephants. We got there just as they were enjoying a pumpkin treat! It was really awesome to see how powerful they are. After the Elephants we stopped for lunch, and headed back to the van. Rdette could hang... she knocked out and before we got there.

It was really a great day. I am so glad that we got to go.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

sniffle,sneeze, and snot.... OH MY!

We had such a great Sunday we did take the girls to Boo at the Zoo and we had a blast. I will share pics of this later. It is funny though how great the day was because that night was just the opposite.

The girls were over tired from the day, so bedtime was a little crankier then normal. OK we knew that would more then likely be the case until they settled. No biggie right... ohhh how new we really are at this!!

Rdette was up every 45-hour every hour all night! We hadn't had a night like this in a very long time. We figured that she was teething, gave her oral-gel. She was never fully awake, she would holler out, and look like she just wasn't comfortable. We didn't want to give her anything more because she just didn't look sick or feel warm. Finally at 4 am she seemed to settle. She slept until 8 in the morning. I went to check on her around 7 and she seemed ok just tired from her night (she not being the only one!). Her head was facing the back of the crib I didn't notice anything really out of the norm. So I left her to sleep.

When she got up at 8 she was smiling sitting in her crib and I didn't notice until I was right on top of her that she looked like she was covered in a cob web! Eww. Her nose was just running like someone turned on the faucet. I got her all cleaned up and we started our day. Through the morning she was a little more clingy but not much more. But she was rubbing at her eyes, I felt her head and she was pretty warm. She had 101 temp, Fantastic! We started the Tylenol and extra fluids and kept wiping her nose.

It just all went downhill from there. The one thing she really needed was a good nap, she only slept for 30 mins all day. She just couldn't get comfy. In the afternoon, I took her temp again still 101 with the Tylenol. The doctor was called and I set up and appointment for her the next day.

In the evening we did all the normal, vapor bath, Vicks chest rub (I started to wonder if you could over dose on this as she had already had it several times during the day), more Tylenol she still had the fever, and some Benadryl. She did sleep ok, we had to get up a couple of times with her, but by 1 am she seemed to finally settle, and she slept until 7 or so.

I took her temp again in the morning, and she still had a fever. It had come down to 100, but I still didn't like it. I went ahead and gave her the some Motrin and that finally did the trick. We hung around the house until it was time for the doctor. Miss. C does have an ear infection, and a cold. Her doctor gave us an antibiotic and we headed home. As a little side note, those who live in MD or pretty close know how blustery and cold it was yesterday. I had both girls layered up. We bought them really nice winter hats that cover their whole head and ears (of course they wear the same size!) they are really cute. Charlotte HATES it. She fought me all the way to the car, bursting into tears, only increasing the snot production. Lily who really is a great big sister, kept telling her it was ok, and trying to hold her hand.

Last night she did much better over night, and slept right through. We still checked her a million times though! This morning her faucet has been turned down, but not off. I am glad that we took her because this morning her snot is really yellow and gross, even with that first dose of the medication.

Right now she is napping, and hopefully will take a nice long one... it is still needed.

As for Lil she had a fever on Monday that topped at 100, but that has been it, no runny nose, cough, nada. Thankfully Lily is one of the healthiest kids ever. She has an immune system of steel. I on the other hand woke up this morning like I had been hit by a mack truck! Chris is also not feeling so hot. Ahh the joy's of parenthood!

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Two months until Santa!!!

OMG you guys (insert 14 year old excitement)...

Really I can't say much about this because I know that family members read this but I have to share...

Chris and I totally (14 again) rocked out this year's Christmas present for our family! We like most people are trying to keep to a budget, but still wanted to do something really nice. We ended up getting an awesome deal and took a leap of faith and OMG we LOVE IT.

Any other Momma's interested and want to know what we did drop me a line. The deal that we got only lasts a few more days, and I am happy to share!

Ok... moment passed 30 year old Mommy has returned....:-)

One more thing about Santa...

Last year we took the girls to Santastic (Jazz hands!), I actually emailed the people that produced it last year and THEY ARE COMING BACK! Until last year we had never seen anything like it. It takes sitting on Santa's lap to a whole new level for the kids. We are very excited about this! If you want to check it out

Big foot sighting...

Not sooo you think...
Miss C (it is a wonder our kids even know thier real names!) is wearing a size 6W, thankfully we have been downgraded from an EXTRA WIDE! Sigh... Just like everything else with this girl she is a mix of Chris and I. Chris has a brick for a foot (I say this out of true love, and he knew I was going to write it!! ) and for my height I got a big'ol clown foot.
So what does Brick + Clown =
Rdette's hard for fit into any kind of reasonable priced shoe foot.
But I love those gigantic piggies!! :-)
The girls and I set out on an adventure this past week to find Miss C some non-tennis shoe, shoes ie Church Shoes. They did pretty well I had to plow on the promises of the Disney store window shopping, and more then once I had to use the 'Mommy' look. But all in all our girls are normally very well behaved when we are out. Lily was a little put off that she was not able to take off her shoes and try on new ones, once she realized that visiting Cinderella was on the agenda that helped!
After trying on several different shoes, all of which made the top of her foot look as if it was a can of biscuits about to explode out of the front of the shoe I asked for some professional assistance. :-) Turns out that her foot looked that way because the shoes were way too small! Doh! Well now that explains it!
Once we got the size thing worked out, a small loan was taken out and we headed out of the store gold oops I mean shoes in hand. ;-)
Believe me this is all said in jest. Her new shoes are adorable, and she knows she looks cute! It is just amazing the size difference between the girls. They are now only one shoe size apart, AND one clothing size apart as well.
After our shoe adventure I guess I wanted to push the envelope a little-the next time I even think about this I need to back away slowly, or maybe even stop drop and roll! I don't know just something to remind that w/out Daddy one trip a day is the limit! But no, I went ahead and after nap we headed over to Target so that I could get a few more things for Lily for the winter.
Lily has apparently shrunk! Historically for us, Targets clothes have been on the smaller side. So I went ahead and bought her 4t in everything. Trying things on happens once we get home and she came pretend she is a bunny while trying on the clothes. Yeah she did...
It was very apparent from the start of trying on that the size choice was very VERY wrong, or these clothes were way over sized. I did pick up a couple of things for Rdette while we were there. LILY COULD WEAR THEM! 18MONTHS! They were too her don't get me wrong but she could wear them!
That night I took 90% of what I had picked out back and bought her 3T for the tops, and 24/2T for her bottoms. Chris made a good point that now she is wearing panties on a full time bases her little bottom isn't as fluffy anymore! She is tiny!
All in all at the end of the day I did have fun with my shopping buddies! For Mommy's sake next time we will split it up in to two days though!

Hot dogs, Tater Tots, and Rain

Today was the first Saturday in a very long time we had nothing to do. Not that we could/would with all the rain. We spent the day playing and watching the Spookies- what Lily calls Halloween shows! It is really cute she will say "ohhhh Mommy there a Spookie right there!" We have been telling her that Spookies are OK and as long as we aren't scared it is ok. She has also been Booing us. She will run up behind us tap on our leg and say 'excuse me.... BOO!' and then laugh like that was the funniest thing ever.

She has been doing the boo/laugh thing so much that Rdette is following suite. She can't Boo, but she will squeal whenever Lily gets going! Tonight after bath Lily was in her room before we were. She had her towel on when she left the bathroom and as I watched her cross the hall, but in the 30 secs it took me to follow her in her towel was gone and a naked giggling child was standing behind the rocking chair. She was trying to Boo us, but she started laughing so hard that she couldn't speak! Silly girl!

Oh as for the Hot Dogs, and Tater Tots... I have found a whole new love in life... my crock pot. I <3 my crock pot. It is simple, inexpensive, and makes the house smell sooo yummy. We have gotten into a 3 meal a week plus Pizza night on Friday schedule. So this morning I set out to make this great yummy ham, green beans,carrots,potatoes meal. It cooks all day.

***A little back story Lily is in the phase Chris and I like to call the 'I don't like waffles.' Hers is more 'I don't like anything green' so we play let's make a deal, or we make up great stories about Dora or Cinderella and how they eat their green things. She will normally buy this just enough to get 1/4 of what we hope to get into her. ***

Back on track: Tonight she looked into her cookie bowl filled to the brim with all the yummyness that is this ham dinner, looks up at me and says 'ohhhh yummy hot dogs and tater tots!' Sigh.. ok if that makes you eat this, that sounds great to me.

She still went through and systematically removed all of the green beans, I think we did get 3 into her. She dry heaves on them, and I feel bad because she is trying to eat them she just can't.

Rdette on the other hand.. she is eating everything that isn't nailed down! She doesn't care what color it is she just wants to eat it. She ate all of hers and signed "more" like crazy! Chris ended up giving her just a little more and she was still signing!

I am so behind with Blogging, there are tons of things to be updated. Stay tuned!

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Birthday Shopping, Part 2

OK, not I know it's been awhile since my first post but as promised here is "Birthday Shopping for Mommy, Part 2". We last left our hero with his 2 beautiful sidekicks running in terror that was Fashion Bug. Now we headed off to go complete our shopping. I took the girls to Arundel Mills Mall to get the last couple of things on our list. I unpacked the double stroller, lock the girls in, and off we go. We first went inside a bookstore to get Megan a copy of Twilight. She mentioned she would like to read it and I thought it would be a great way for her to "get away from it all." Then I hear the 5 words no father wants to here when out in public: "I go peepee now daddy?" luckily the bookstore had a restroom so off we trout. It was a small bathroom but large enough for the double stroller (remember I have Rdette with me as well) if I leave the stall door open. Well as soon as I get in and have Lily's pants down another person comes in to utilize the facilities. Great. Purely on impulse, I push the stroller into the handicap stall thinking there would be plenty of room. WRONG!!!! Me and Charlotte were just about sitting on top of one another while Lily goes peepee. I also figure since we were already there and we had about another hour or so to go, I try to go as well (Megan I am sure will comment on this latter) :) So I wouldn't scar my children, I have Lily go stand in a corner while I pick up the stroll and flip it 180 degrees and proceeded. Now comes the 5 words no man wants to here in a bathroom: "I open door now, Daddy." (Notice this was a statement, not a request). GREAT!!!! Why not. So I am making a mad dash to finish before my toddler exposes me to the world. Finally, we finished, washed our hands, and left the store. And yes, we got the book.

Now off to Bath and Body Works. This is more of a sweet moment. We were in the store trying to find something for Mommy. Now up to this point the girls had not picked out anything themselves, and knowing that would me a lot to Megan, I figure what the hell. So Lily, Charlotte, and I start walking in a circle around the store and I told Lily to stop once she finds the perfect gift for Mommy. We must have made 4 laps with a lot of giggles from the store staff, when Lily points excitedly, "Ohh, there Daddy." So I pull over and we found a scent that Megan really loves. So Lily picked out some hand soap, and she picked out for Charlotte some body spray.

All in all it was very fun time and I would do it again anytime, just maybe not both at the same time. Megan I tip my hat to you. You can do a weeks worth of grocery shopping, doctors appointments, and play dates, with both girls at the same time and make it look easy. I love you and I hope your birthday was as special as you are to your family.



Monday, October 20, 2008

Pumpkin Patch

Rdette is looking for just the right one to eat!

The 3 Little Bears

If you look @ the left lower corner you can see Chris's shoe. She was too short and he had to hold her up! LOL

Our two little pumpkins

The front entrance to the Farm!
Rdette cutie pie!
Pony rides are a MUST!
Big girl walking in the patch
She picked up the first one she saw and fell in love. Then she kept trying to add to the collection!

On Saturday we took the girls to the Pumpkin Patch. We had never been to this farm before. But I was soooo excited because they had taken and restored some of the attractions from the Enchanted Forest.

It was funny to see how different the weather was in just one week. Last weekend they had on shorts and on Saturday they were in long pants and jackets! But in the end our mission was accomplished, tons of fun was had and pumpkins were in the car!

There is MUCH more to add about the weekend, but Mr. Henry needs to computer to check out classes for the spring semester! Yup, he is headed back to college! He is super excited and us girls are SUPER proud of him! Go Daddy, get your ed on, Go Daddy! :-)

I will be catching up the blog tomorrow! Have a great night!

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Lot's O change

As your have probably already noticed the blog is changed again. I really liked the other background, but it was too translucent. This one isn't that much better, but it is hard to find non-scary Halloween backgrounds so this one is going to due until I change it again for Thanksgiving at the end of this month!

The girls are doing ok. Rdette had a fever yesterday 101.5- gave her Tylenol and it quickly broke. We let her stay up a little later last night so that I could get another dose into her. This morning she woke up screeching- she must be feeling better. Lily has the immune system of gold. Thankfully, she hasn't shown any signs of not feeling well.

Keeping them well through the week, this weekend we are going to pick our pumpkins! Off to another farm!! We have been looking forward to this one because the farm also has pieces from the Enchanted Forest. We went there all the time when I was little, but it closed a few years ago. We are really excited to go on Saturday.

Next Friday we are going to take the girls to Boo at the zoo! At the National Zoo! I told Lily about that today and she started shouting Panda Bears!!

I am going to scoot, it is rest/nap time ie. borrowed time! ;-)

Monday, October 13, 2008

Something special about today...

It's not a birthday, or anniversary. But it something that is a once in a lifetime event:

Today Charlotte is exactly as old as Lily was the day she was placed in our arms forever.

One year, and eight days!

In so many ways they are the same, we can finally say, remember when Lily did this or that. They are such great playmates and sisters. I hope they always will be.

Lily 1 year 8 days

Charlotte 1 year 7 days

Keep growing baby girls!

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Fantasic Fall Weekend!

Rdette's new do!

Stan the MAN!


It's getting CLOSE!! Rdette new favorite toy- not sure if she is giving a kiss or chewing in his nose!

Hands down my new favorite picture!!

Lily getting her face painted- for the first time!
Painting our pumpkin!
Rdette in the Hay
Lily in the hay

I love the fall and this weekend was every reason why!

Friday we went grocery shopping in the morning and then it was time for the Charlotte's check up. These are her stats now:

Wt 25 lbs, Ht 31" 100% healthy. She was given 3 shots, including the flu, and we do not go back now until 2009!

Ready for a smile....

I asked for Lily to be weighed also, for medications etc. She is a peanut 29 lbs! Chris and I were joking on the way home the Rdette just needs to seal the deal! it is really just a matter of time!!

LOL At least Lily still has height on her side!

Once we were done there it was close to dinner time so we came home and spent a quiet evening with the girls. After their bath I pulled out my Mommy brave card and trimmed bangs on both girls! Lily always looks sweet and sits pretty well for it. This was a first time to cut any kind of hair on Charlotte. She did great and looks so cute!
They were just getting so long and were in her eyes.

Chris and I got looking for something to do one Saturday since it was going to be so nice, and we found a local park was having a Harvest Festival. Even better it was FREE! Wahoo!

On Saturday morning we headed over. This park is really close to our home but we have never been there. It is a converted farm. It is so open and sprawling. We had a really fantastic time. Lily got her face painted, then promptly wiped it on her sleeve. It was an accident she was upset that she touched it. That was until we painted a pumpkin, sleeves rolled even higher, but we still got a little messy-imagine that! Then while our pumpkin was drying we headed over and made our very first Scarecrow! Or as Lily calls it a ScareRow!

Rdette LOVED being in the hay, she only tried to eat it a few times, so we thought that was great! She just sat so pretty. She kept picking it up looking at it in the sun. She also wanted very little to do with her stroller and wanted to walk as much as possible. We spent lots of time in the grass!

The rest of Saturday was spent in the playroom. It was just so nice.

Today, we put our holiday door on the front door. I do this with each season/holiday. We worked on that during the morning, then after lunch Lil and I headed outside. We put a Raven's sweatshirt on Stan our Scarecrow! We then moved him to a chair in front of our porch! We also relocated Mum's to a bigger container. Note to self:

2 year-olds REALLY like to play in the dirt. LOL

At one point she was "helping" me dig a hole in the planter deep enough, and I ended up with an eye full of dirt! While I was scrambling to blink it out she said 'Opps I soory Mommy, you ok?' Such a sweetie! It made the temporary blindness totally worth it!! :-)

The rest of today we just spent together playing and then tonight Lily treated us to a dance party in our living room. During which time Charlotte wandered around the room looking for things to get into.

Tomorrow I have a sink full of dishes, 2 loads of laundry to fold, and will have a huge smile on my heart when I remember this weekend.

Monday, October 6, 2008


In case you were wondering about the new addition on the right of the page....

This year on Jan 24, 2009 The BIG DADDY PLUNGER'S will be hitting the frigid water of the Chesapeake Bay to help raise money for the Special Olympics. An organization near and dear to our hearts. We are on the hunt for more team members to join us. So far it is just us, and we would LOVE more.

If you don't want to take the plunge, but still want to help you can donate to BIG DADDY PLUNGER'S through the website.

If you want to join/donate just go to this website

MSP Polar Bear Plunge – January 24, 2009 – Brought to you by Special Olympics Maryland and Aerotek

Click on Plunger's
Read the disclaimer (click I agree)
Pick Join a Team
Find BIG DADDY Plunger's
Then fill out all your information

** When you sign up you are pledging to deliver $50.00 in donations.**

There isn't a fee to Plunge, BUT you do need to acquire $50.00 in sponsor money.

Come out and play, We (OK I) have always wanted to do this. It is going to be a great time for an even better cause!

Look for updates as we get closer! Chris is in training... he doesn't do cold water. I keep telling him Eye of the tiger Chris eye of the TIGER when I turn the water cold in the shower!! I am sooo going to go now and add that to my playlist!

In the coming days Chris has a surprise to help stir-up donations! Oh my it is GOOD!!!

Party time!

Miss. Rdette's party went off w/out a hitch on Sunday! A good time was had by all and even more so by Charlotte! She was just waking up from her nap when her first guests were arriving. We got her dressed, and it was time to PARTY!! Lily helped her open some of her presents, then Mommy and Daddy helped with the rest. Charlotte mostly kicked back and enjoyed a drink on Mommy's lap, and tried to eat the tissue paper! :-)

We then moved onto CAKE!! I did make Charlotte her own cake to destroy...opps I mean eat! She made a mess, but I must admit she was much neater then I thought she would be. Chris a little disappointed at her daintiness helped her understand to dig into to it!

We spent the rest of the evening playing and breaking up toddler brawls over the new toys! Charlotte was also walking ALL over through the weekend. She is still working on standing without holding onto anything. Lily didn't do that at first either!

It was a great day from sun up to sun down! Now she is on her way to number 2!!

Enjoy Rdette's smash cake... she did!! ;-)

Thank you to everyone who came to celebrate our girl and her very special day!

Sunday, October 5, 2008


Dear Charlotte Mae,

Today you complete your first trip around the sun. One year ago today we were blessed for the second time all in one year. You came into this world with the same determination we now wittness as you walk. The day you were born also brought a great deal of unknowns. Who knew a baby could spit up that much, and seem to sleep so little. Day by day, week by week, month by month we have all gotten adjusted and now Daddy and I look at you and your sister and wonder what we ever did without you.

This was a year of first's for you.

First Smile

First Laugh

First tooth First crawl

And that set of first stumbled yet beautiful steps.

Charlotte you have taught Daddy and I so much. You taught us that we could indeed love another child as unyielding as we love your big sister. That everyday is a gift, baby kisses are the sweetest in the world, and that true happiness can be found in a full tummy and Mommy's arms. Today as we celebrate your birthday it will be a reminder that nothing should be taken for granted. You will never remember this first year, but Daddy and I will never forget it.

Thank you for being our Daughter. You and your sister have made our cups runnth over. We love you as high as the sky and as deep as the ocean, it will never end.

Happy 1st Birthday Sweet Rdette Mae! :-)


Mommy and Daddy

Friday, October 3, 2008

Finding my happy spot

I have the best kids and Hubby on the planet! They made me feel so special and loved. :-) I spent the morning with the girls. I asked Lily in the morning if she remember what was special about the day, and she looked up at me sippy cup in mouth and said "Santa coming?" LOL

Chris came home early and we waited for Rdette to wake up from her nap. We were going to head to the craft store but it started to rain really hard. So while we waiting we opened presents! I don't want to post everything, but I did get everything I asked for and a 'Little Blue BOX!!!!' OMG!!! Wow! Chris asked me a while back what I wanted for my birthday and I in fun said something in a little blue box. He being a wonderfully male, had a blank what are you talking about expression on his face. I NEVER expected him to do anything like this!

Another sweet moment happened later in the afternoon, Lily looked up me and asked "you like you party Mommy?" COME ON!!! Too sweet! Oh and Chris let the girls sign their cards... Charlotte's has a bite mark on the corner!! LOL I have been calling her my sweet little goat! She will eat ANYTHING!!

I had a great day and it was all due to my great hubby, and girls. Thank you so much for making me smile!

We are well on track for this weekend for Miss Rdette! We have been singing Happy Birthday loudly every night at dinner. We sing it everyone at Lily's request! When we sing it for her we say her whole name, and like it is on cue she says "That's me!" She is excited to see everyone coming. Rdette is looking most forward to the cake!!

OHHH big Rdette news!! She is completely off of her bottle and taking 95% whole milk now! Wahoo! She is totally on table food and as long as it is really well chopped she does great with it! She is walking longer and longer distances, but will still crawl to get away fast when I try to get something out of her mouth! It is almost like this is a new game for her!! She KNOWS I am going to chase after her, so she cheeks it and takes off. The really funny part is that sometimes she will get laughing so hard that she can't crawl!!

Before I go I want to say THANK YOU again to everyone who remembered me for my birthday. A special thank you to Chris you know what you did, and you know why I am thankful forever to you for protecting your family. I love you.

Thursday, October 2, 2008

Matthew 5:44

I try very hard to not include negative things here on the blog. VERY HARD. Not that I am trying to hide a thing about Chris and I or our girls. What you read here normally is truly our day to day life.

There is however an extremely negative element to our lives. I was reminded of it again today. I don't even know if I am even going to post this or not so I am going to try to not divulge too much, to protect us. Please forgive me for this.

Matthew 5:44-5
44But I tell you to love your enemies and pray for anyone who mistreats you. 45Then you will be acting like your Father in heaven. He makes the sun rise on both good and bad people. And he sends rain for the ones who do right and for the ones who do wrong.

Could you even imagine opening a birthday card addressed to you- and reading this?! The best/worst part they wrote "I still love and care for you". I didn't recognize the verse at first as in the card it was just put behind the senders name ( ex name Matthew 5:44). Obviously I saw the name Matthew and there was already twinge in my heart, but then to look it up and read what the verse was, it made me ill.

What kind of person uses your Son like that?! They knew what they were going to do me the minute the wrote his name in that card. Now, do I understand that it wasn't him they were inferring to, yes. But what most people do not know is that for sometime I have struggled with his loss. I just want to know where he is and that he is safe. I may never get that information, and that is something that I am slowly dealing with. There have been many tears shed recently as I am just now processing his loss. He was our baby for 7 months and they day they took him from us it was as if he died.

Do I consider myself perfect? Not my an inch, but I am not a bad person. I am a Momma, who with a Daddy decided that we would not longer allow ourselves or our children to continue with a toxic relationship. So we stopped it. This person cannot let it go.

There was also a card sent for Charlotte. This person has NEVER met her, and NEVER will. The fact that the card came irritated me for several reasons, the biggest being that nothing was sent for Lily's. Now, PLEASE understand that I DON'T WANT ANYTHING SENT HERE EVER, but it did make me take pause. Why for one and not the other? I will never figure it out and don't wish to spend anymore time on it then I already have.

I have already written the return address on both cards and they will be going back out to the mail soon. I had to write the address because the person must think that on top of being a bad person I am also dumb and won't realize who it is from. So I open it make sure I am right and fill in the return address myself.

Again I am sorry to use this as a forum for this mess, but this is my outlet.

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Whip out the Pine Tree Deodorizers! Happy Birthday to ME!

So today is the BIG DAY! I officially become old and stinky. I am the youngest of my High School friends and for each one I reminded them quite happily that I was STILL in my 20's and not old and stinky like they were. Today the playing field evens out again! There is only one problem I don't know what I am going to wish for when I blow out my candles.

Believe me this isn't going to be all hallmark and sappy, well maybe a little, but it is all truthful. Like the old song says 'It's my party and I'll BLOG if I want too!' OK I don't think that was the original version... it works for this though!!

For each birthday since my 22nd I have wished for a baby. As each year rolled by I began to bargain with the Birthday Wish Granter. Asking just to be pregnant before the next birthday. When that STILL didn't work I began to dread my birthday. I knew what I would ask for, and I knew that the next year would have the same outcome.

This was until my 27th birthday! I had my baby boy in my heart and I wished with all my heart to just simply bring him home. We all know how well that turned out. :-(

The following birthday we were still waiting to exit PGN with Lily with no real end in sight. I remember not even blowing candles out that year. 15 days later we got the call we were waiting for. A little late but still the best birthday present I had ever been given. I was a Mommy.

Fast forward to last year. October 1, I remember being very upset that I couldn't eat a piece of my own cupcake. Chris saved it for me (it got was a little stale- but very sweet- Chris, not the cupcake). I was extremely pregnant, terrified, and ready to give birth. Four days later my wish came true and I was a Mommy for a second time! All in one year! Two great birthday's back to back I was on a ROLL!!

I remember that I told Chris that it was like all of those birthday wishes were put on someones desk who was on vacation for 7 years! They all got processed at the same time LOL!

Now, today I honestly don't know what I will wish for. Not that I could tell anyway! I will be very careful though, you never know if the Birthday Wish Granter is on vacation again! I will have to remember what I wish for this time and see how long it takes!